2 “CrossFit” Jargon Pet Peeves

Some pet peeves of mine that I see when reading CrossFit workouts from gyms. I was just reading a bunch of the “12 Days of Christmas” WODs posted to the CrossFit Facebook page and saw one comment that wasn’t even in a 12 Days of Christmas format (it was just a long grueling workout) and another post who asked “if other gyms make you go back and do each day over like the song”? If you are doing a “12 Days of Christmas” workout you better have something like 1 wall walk, 2 burpees, 3 handstand push ups, etc, etc and the pattern should be 1 wall walk followed by 2 burpees and 1 wall walk, followed by 3 HSPU, 2 burpees and 1 wall walk, etc. If it varies from that in anyway, it’s not a 12 Days of Christmas workout.  (Not saying you have to use those movements for those days, those are just examples of movements one might select.)

So, in reading some comments here are some things I saw:

Referring to the “Bear Complex” and meaning power clean + front squat + push press + back squat + behind the neck push press – without putting the bar down. This is not a Bear complex, this is ONE SEVENTH of a Bear complex. I suppose this is nitpicking, but it drives me crazy when people think the Bear complex is just one time through those movements. It is supposed to be those movements SEVEN times WITHOUT PUTTING THE BAR DOWN. If you go through that complex one time, it’s just a complex. Educate yourself:

Nice jean shorts, bro. Love the old videos before every CrossFit video you watch is covered in Reebok and Rogue logos. Just regular people doing CrossFit in regular clothes. Ya, I still wear basketball shorts to the gym. Sue me.

Next up…

Seeing the words “squat” and “snatch” used together or “squat” and “clean”. Look, there is a snatch and a clean and jerk. There are variations of those movements in whether or not you break parallel in the catch of either. There are variations in where the bar starts, but there is no such thing as a squat snatch or a squat clean. That’s like saying a dunk in basketball is a jump shot dunk. Of course you have to jump to dunk the ball. Of course you have to squat to perform a snatch or a clean. The only people that want to know if a clean is a “squat clean” are those not mobile enough or capable of performing a clean. Watch any national weightlifting event and no one will utter the words squat snatch. It doesn’t exist.  I often feel that I failed as a coach when someone in my class asks what the difference is between a snatch and a power snatch. A little piece of me dies inside. Then someone takes the hot poker and twists it into my heart when someone else speaks up and says that a power snatch starts at your knees and a snatch starts from the ground. Lord help me!!

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Do you have anything that is either routinely misinterpreted or or redundant (think “Sport SUV”…what? That vehicle is a Sport Sport Utility Vehicle?!).

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“Super teams” for the CrossFit Games and Lindy Barber

Let me start by saying this – I like Lindy Barber. I think she is an amazing story, appears to be super nice based on Instagram (and who can’t believe everything they see on Instagram?!) and she is pretty darn cute. This is not an attack on her, although some might read it that way. This is more about the building of “super teams” for the CrossFit Games.

As recently as a few years ago I used to like the team portion of the CrossFit Games almost more than the individual. I liked seeing gyms I have been to, worked out at or were from Denver locally compete. They were full of athletes that were most likely everyday people – meaning they worked out once, maybe twice a day -maybe, and had a full time job outside of CrossFit. It was representative of how “fit” the gym was or how good their athletes were. I liked watching CrossFit Kilo because I have worked out there and they are from my hometown – Waterloo, Iowa (OK…Cedar Falls…same thing). The first Games I watched in 2012 also had Front Range CrossFit competing and at the time that was THE BOX, in my newbie opinion, in the Denver area. Largely because they were competing at the CrossFit Games. At that time I was pretty new to the sport and it amazed me that a gym I new and had been too for competitions and almost joined made it that far.

That is all gone.

Last year we had NorCal CrossFit which seemingly had a team that would compete together for several years. On that team was Jason Khalipa, the guy who, like, finished in the top five of every CrossFit Games, ever…or something. (Now it is interesting because all that love that team showed for each other appears to have passed. Miranda Oldroyd and Molly Volmer are going individual, or so I have read. I have not heard about Khalipa and what his plans are.)

There are plenty of articles around the internet talking about other super teams, like this one talking about Conjugate CrossFit and their building of a super team a few years ago. And this article also takes me to my topic: CrossFit Mayhem Freedom.

Last year Rich Froning went team and recruited his workout buddies and James Hobart who I could have sworn lived in the Northeast. Of course, this wouldn’t have been the first time a Games level athlete relocated to Tennessee just to workout with Rich. But, lately, I have seen lot of Instagram posts from Hobart back in the Northeast. As we all know Mayhem won the Affiliate Cup. Blah, blah, blah, we all know Rich wins everything in CrossFit. If it wasn’t for the notorious rope climb incident in 2010 he would have almost literally won EVERY CrossFit competition he has entered – including Regionals and Opens. (Save for the Open last year and the CrossFit Invitational a few years ago.)

This year it appears he recruited Lindy Barber. I can only assume it is to replace the lady on their team last year that was definitely a weakness. Of course, let me be clear, being a “weakness” on Rich Froning’s team is being super elite in pretty much any walk of life….and I think she is over 40!

Here is Lindy’s first Instagram about joining Mayhem:

According to her profile on the Games website her home box is Four Barrel CrossFit. That is located in Indiana and approximately (according to Google maps) 190 miles and a 3.5 hour drive from CrossFit Mayhem Freedom in Cookeville, TN. I think Barber is married, but who knows, I thought maybe it wouldn’t be out of the question for her to pickup and move to train with her new team. Since then I have only seen one post of her training with (or at) Mayhem.

That is versus four posts since then, none of which were at Mayhem (Mayhem has a pretty distinct look about it and these don’t appear to be from there).

Will she eventually move there and workout there full time? Will she only be there a few days a week? What exactly does she need to do to qualify to be apart of their team?

All I do know is this makes it nearly impossible for a team like CrossFit Kilo or Front Range CrossFit to win a CrossFit Games Affiliate Cup anymore. Which is a shame. Dave Castro might as well just do a “pro” and “amateur” division for the Affiliate Cup and let all the superstars of CrossFit form teams and compete. Who cares if they actually workout together?